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Enoch Bolles
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WHATTTT???? a baddass kitty ;P
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hahahahha <3
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HAHAHAHA WUT?!
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<3 <3
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Bee Sting by Demetri Martin
MAUREEN
I was in the park, having a picnic with some friends. All of a sudden, a bee started to circle around my head. Then the bee attacked me. I calmly attempted to shoo it away, but it would not leave me alone. then it became even more aggressive. I then tried to move away, but the agitated bee followed me. Hoping to stop its assault, I attempted to gently swat it away with a magazine. I missed, and, sure enough, the bee stung me. I’d never been stung by a bee before. It hurt, but I did my best to grin and bear it. I put some ointment on the bee sting, and after that I felt fine.BRENDA (MAUREEN’S FRIEND)
I was on the phone when Maureen got stung by the bee. I felt bad for her. But I think she overreaacted a little bit if you ask me, especially when she started to scream and wildly swing her arms around. It was really pretty embarassing.BEE
I was in the middle of another busy workday, flying my usual route. I was on my way back to the hive, minding my own business, when an enormous, fleshy monster began to scream, and then it spastically lunged at me, At first I thought I might have flown into the middle of a medical emergency or some sort of tribal dance that the monster was performing. But then it quickly became clear that the monster was trying to kill me. I turned around and started to fly away. But the monster became even more enraged and began to chase me. I could not escape it. I flew faster, but the wailing beast pursued me and kept swinging its rolled-up paper weapon at me. As much as I didn’t want to, I had no choice but to sting the monster. It was the only thing I could do to stop it from following me home and threathening the well-being of the hive or worse, the safety of my family. I hoped that if I stung the monster I could thwart its assault enough to save my kids. I knew that I would die soon after administering the sting, but i really had no other option. What a tragedy it is to be forced by a senseless, hysterical beast to take one’s own life.MAGAZINE
I’m not sure what happened. I was being held and slowly read by some woman when all of a sudden she rolled me up and started to choke me and violently whip me around. After having my face smashed into the arm of a lawn chair a couple times and then into the surface of a picnic table, I was tossed to the ground. It was a terrible and demeaning experience that I’ll never forget.LAWN CHAIR
I don’t know what his problem was, but the magazine I was hanging out with abruptly got up and smacked me twice for no reason.BRENDA’S PHONE
Brenda was talking into me when the incident happened. I didn’t get to see or hear anything because Brenda is such a loud and obnoxious phone talker. Whenever she uses me it’s like I’m cut off from the world. If I had enough power in my lithium battery to electrocute her face, I would. Seriously, I would do it. She is that annoying.LITHIUM BATTERY
I second that.OINTMENT
I am effective at temporarily relieving pain and itching associated with insect bites, minor burns, sunburn, minor skin irritations, scrapes, and rashes due to poison ivy, poison oak, and poison sumac.SQUIRREL IN NEARBY TREE
I am still too upset to talk about what happened. I was good friends with Chris. I can’t believe what that woman did to him. He was a hardworking, God-fearing bee, who had a family and a good job. What that woman had against him, I’ll never know. To tell you the truth I don’t even think she knew him. What a bitch. I’m going to find out where she lives, go to her yard, and act crazy on her fence.TREE
No comment.GOD
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Forcing a bee to commit suicide is one of my biggest pet peeves. This is not good for this Maureen person. -
this one is for airiq lol
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<3
About me
so oblivious to reality...most of the time im caught up in my own imagination.
